


lay down your soul (come settle down)

by Some_Dead_Guy



Series: Grindeldore Oneshots [3]
Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares, Romance, The summer of 1899, Visions, Young Albus Dumbledore, Young Gellert Grindelwald
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-08
Updated: 2019-10-08
Packaged: 2020-11-27 06:20:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20943728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Some_Dead_Guy/pseuds/Some_Dead_Guy
Summary: “Gellert jerks his attention to Albus, heterochromatic eyes wide and horrified. Gellert has always been some form of poised, even though they’ve only known each other for a little over a month, Albus is confident Gellert has only ever wanted to present himself as calm and collected and elegant. Albus isn’t sure what to do with a Gellert who isn’t, who is shaking and sweating out of sheer panic.”Or Gellert has horrible visions, and Albus comforts him.





	lay down your soul (come settle down)

**Author's Note:**

> This is not beta-read, so please excuse any mistakes.

Albus is laying in Gellert’s bed, both undressed and tangled up in each other. Gellert is asleep next to him, his head under Albus’s chin and his soft breaths tickling Albus’s collarbones in his slumber. Albus plays with Gellert’s hair, carefully curling the strands between his fingers.

Gellert almost always fall asleep first, leaving Albus awake to stew in his thoughts. Though Albus does enjoy simply laying in silence, listening to Gellert’s deep breaths and wondering how he could be lucky enough to meet such a person.

Wonderful, brilliant,  _ beautiful  _ Gellert Grindelwald loves  _ him,  _ allows  _ him  _ in his bed, in his thoughts. Albus Dumbledore loves and is somehow loved back by Gellert Grindelwald. He’s not sure he’ll ever get used to it, having the affection and attention of this beautiful person with a beautiful mind. He’s almost drunk on his happiness.

He’s torn out of his thoughts when Gellert’s breath stutters. Albus pulls back, looking down at Gellert with concern. Gellert whimpers then, his brows furrowing and he begins to breathe more harshly. It’s almost as if he’s in pain and Albus starts to sit up.

“Gellert,” Albus says, becoming panicked as his lover begins to curl in on himself, breaking out into a sweat. 

“Gellert!” Albus raises his voice, properly scared when Gellert starts  _ screaming. _ Albus has no idea what to do, doesn’t know if he’s supposed to wait it out or wake him up. His aunt can’t hear him, silencing spells put up in Gellert's from earlier preventing her from doing so, but Albus is terrified and is tempted to run down to her bedroom stark naked to get help.

He doesn’t have to come to a decision on what to do because Gellert bolts up, grasping at his arms and breathing raggedly. He immediately hunches over, staring down into his lap, as if he’s forgotten Albus was even there.

Albus swallows thickly, “Gellert.” He whispers, frightened he’ll startle the other boy.

Gellert jerks his attention to Albus, heterochromatic eyes wide and  _ horrified.  _ Gellert has always been some form of poised, even though they’ve only known each other for a little over a month, Albus is confident Gellert has only ever wanted to present himself as calm and collected and elegant. Albus isn’t sure what to do with a Gellert who isn’t, who is shaking and sweating out of sheer panic.

“Albus.” Gellert says hoarsely, voice strained from-  _ Merlin,  _ screaming his lungs out in his sleep.

Albus reaches out slowly despite his doubts in knowing what to do, placing a hand on Gellert’s shoulder and urging him closer. Gellert comes willingly, fitting his face in Albus’s shoulder and wrapping his arms tightly around Albus's torso. Albus allows him to hold on as tightly as he wants, and he comfortingly runs his finger up and down Gellert’s back and through his golden hair.

Albus listens to Gellert as he steadies his breath, his own chest tight as he feels every shiver Gellert makes against his shoulder and chest. They sit in silence for a few moments, both calming down in each other’s presence. 

Albus eventually breaks it, “Do you want to talk about it?” He asks cautiously, trying to figure out what Gellert will be comfortable with.

Gellert doesn’t speak for almost a full minute, and Albus is about to take it back when Gellert begins talking, “It was a vision.” Albus’s confused silence prompts him to explain, “I- I haven’t told you. I’m a seer.” He almost mumbles, quiet and Albus barely catches it.

But the words eventually register and he murmurs an intelligent, “Oh.” Gellert begins to pull back, his head ducked and avoiding Albus’s eyes, “No, that wasn’t a bad ‘oh’!” Albus gently grabs Gellert’s hands, clasping them between his own, “I was just surprised, that’s all.”

When Gellert lifts his head to meet Albus's eyes, he continues, “And you can tell me what you saw.”

Gellert looks hesitant, and there are tears in his eyes that threaten to spill down over his porcelain cheeks. Albus squeezes his hands in silent encouragement, smiling softly at the younger boy in front of him.

Gellert opens and closes his mouth several times, desperately looking for something to say, and it’s so different than what Albus’s used to. Gellert speechless is a rare sight, and in many other situations it could be humorous, but Albus just feels tired and sad and out of his depth. Albus comforts Gellert every way he knows how to anyway.

“I-” Gellert breathes harshly, face twisting up in annoyance at himself when he chokes on the syllable. 

“You could show me.” Albus says abruptly, “I’m a Legilimens, you could pass it to me.” Albus thinks he’s helping, allowing Gellert to show him instead of struggle to try and explain it. 

Gellert’s breath stutters violently and his eyes are wide again, his face contorting into something that makes Albus’s throat seize up. “Albus-” He hiccups on a sob, “I can’t, I can’t-”

Gellert starts to hyperventilate, breath catching in his throat and coming out in weak puffs. 

“Gellert,” Albus’s voice is steady despite his own rising panic, “you need to breathe, dear. Come on, Gellert.”

Albus leans in and makes sure Gellert can see and hear him and begins to breathe deeply, demonstrating what he needs Gellert to do. Gellert clings to Albus’s hands and wrists as he begins to copy him, breathing shakily but slowly steadying. There’s a flow of tears down his face now, and Albus wants to wipe them away but is too afraid to move. 

They breathe together, and soon Gellert is only quietly crying. “I’m sorry.” Gellert sniffles, seeming as if he wants to wipe the tears from his face but doesn’t want to let go of Albus.

“There’s no need to.” Albus says truthfully, because Gellert has done nothing for him to think otherwise. He distantly realizes that Gellert is squeezing his wrists hard enough to bruise.

“And you do not need to tell me anything tonight if you do not want to.” Albus reassures him. Even if he’s curious, even though he never noticed that Gellert was a seer, and that he wants to know more about his visions and why he hadn’t told Albus yet. It can all wait, Gellert’s comfort and safety above any of Albus’s curiosities.

Gellert sits and contemplates what Albus had said, face as impassive and as beautiful as it always is, even in his state of disarray. “I think I want to try to explain it.” He concedes, but immediately catches Albus’s eyes and they’re dark and determined, “I refuse to show you, I will not subjugate you to the things I’ve seen. It is non negotiable.” And Albus knows not to argue, knows he will get nowhere with how stubborn both of them are.

“Of course.” Albus agrees.

Gellert visibly relaxes, and Albus feels Gellert’s hands move to hold Albus’s properly. “I’ve seen it before, I believe, but it was far less vivid the last time.” Gellert shudders, and if Albus hadn’t been paying such close attention he probably wouldn’t have noticed. “It looked like a war. A terrible, terrible war. I could hear people screaming, see the destruction and buildings falling all around them. There were gunshots and fire, people burning and the  _ screaming,  _ Albus.” Gellert’s hands begin to shake in Albus’s, and he holds on to them tighter. Albus squeezes back.

Albus remains silent, lets Gellert say everything he needs to say without interruption. “There was an explosion, huge and bright and  _ horrible. _ Albus, how could they-” Gellert swallows, the last letter choked off.

“Gellert.” Albus whispers, unsure of what to say, what to think. He almost wishes he could’ve seen it too, despite how terrible he knew it was. He didn’t want Gellert to suffer with this alone.

“Albus, that’s not even the worst part.” Gellert chuckles humorlessly, shaking his head and he’s crying again. “It’s selfish, it’s so incredibly selfish, but that was not worse than what else I saw.” Gellert breathes in shakily and determidly meets Albus’s eyes again, “After that, there was another one. In it,” Gellert blinks rapidly, working his throat around what he’s going to say next, “Albus, you died. I watched you die,  _ saw _ you die and I never want to have to see it again.”

Albus breathes in sharply, and suddenly imagines watching Gellert die. He imagines watching that brilliant spark leaving his mismatched eyes, his pale skin becoming paler, him becoming cold and seeped of life. He imagines a world without Gellert, and he almost can’t bear it.

“Oh, Gellert.” Albus breathes, and when he pulls Gellert as close as possible, they’re both crying. 

“Please don’t leave me.” Gellert murmurs, voice wet and quiet but impossible not to hear when they’re so close.

“I won’t, I’m not going anywhere.” Albus whispers back, rocking them gently back in forth on Gellert’s mattress.

“Promise.” Gellert says, “Albus, promise me, please.”

“I promise.”

Albus continues to hold Gellert in his arms for what feels like a small eternity, upset and scared and confused, but content in the arms of his lover. 

Albus isn’t completely aware of his surroundings again until he sees light streaming in from Gellert’s window. Albus traces Gellerts spine, propping his chin on his shoulder and just watches the light grow in force. He sighs and pulls away, but with great reluctance.

“Do you want breakfast?” He asks quietly, and he cups Gellert’s face and wipes away stray tears. Albus pulls Gellert’s head up a bit, silently asking Gellert to look at him.

Gellert eventually does, and Albus can’t help but frown slightly when he sees how bloodshot and puffy his eyes are. 

“No.” Gellert answers, raising his hand to cover the one Albus has on his face. Gellert turns his head and kisses Albus’s palm, closing his eyes as his brows furrow. He looks like he’s on the verge of becoming upset again.

“Don’t think like that, love.” Albus says, already knowing every anxious thought that’s flitting through Gellert’s mind because he’s thinking the same exact things. 

_ How truly long is our time together? _

“Albus,” Gellert murmurs, looking ready to jump in to some melancholic speech that will most likely end in tears and wallowing in bed all day.

Albus interrupts him before he can even start. “Shush. I’m here, aren’t I? And I have no intention of leaving.”

“But, Albus-”

“But  _ nothing _ Gellert. If I were to die tomorrow, would you like our last day together consist of you agonizing over it?”

Gellert’s eyes widen in alarm, “No.”

Albus smiles, “And even if I am to die in decades to come or in a few months, do you want it to be spent in such melancholy? Would you want to be upset, to waste all the time you could take up with me scared that any day your vision may come true?”

Gellert pushes into Albus’s palm even more, almost nuzzling into it, “No, love. I’d want to do everything with you. I’d want to love you so much you drown with it, kiss you so much you become breathless. I’d want to take you to restaurants and buy you as many sweets as you want, take you to see the  _ world _ . I’d deny you nothing, because there’s nothing you could ask of me that I wouldn’t willingly give.”

Albus is flushes hotly when Gellert kisses each of his fingertips, as he drags his lips tenderly over his knuckles. “I wouldn’t be opposed if you decided to get started already.” Albus mumbles, going for cheeky but the effect is ruined by how red he must look.

Gellert smiles almost wickedly, eyes sparked with the mischief Albus loves so much. 

Gellert pushes him back into the bed and kisses him until he’s gasping, until every inch of his body is alight in flame. Albus holds onto Gellert like he’s the most precious thing in his world because he  _ is. _

The only person in the world at this moment is Gellert Grindelwald, and Albus is so deeply in love with him that he should be frightened. But he could never be scared of Gellert, could never imagine a world where they would even consider harming each other. 

“I love you, Gellert.” Albus says, fingers interlaced at the back of Gellert’s neck. 

“I love you too, Albus.” Gellert answers back, reverent and almost worshipping.

Albus is compliant under Gellert’s fingers and lips until almost noon, and Gellert only stops touching him when he insists his aunt will start wondering what they’re doing.

Gellert keeps their hands clasped together as they walk down the stairs into the dining room, and Albus wants to stay with this boy for the rest of his life.

Wonderful, brilliant,  _ beautiful  _ Gellert Grindelwald loves  _ him,  _ and Albus will be damned if there ever comes a day where he won’t be able to say he loves him back.

Because he knows it would be a lie.

And years later, when Gellert has killed dozens, has wreaked his havoc, and becomes one of the greatest threats the Wizarding world has ever known, Albus still knows it is a lie.

He has always, and always will love Gellert Grindelwald and it’s both his gift and his curse.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I haven’t written this much in months, and I just have so many ideas for these two. I actually love writing these fics and I’m really glad people seem to enjoy them.
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated!


End file.
